(Star Wars fans will know that the hero, Luke Skywalker, discovered his father to be his deadly nemesis, Darth Vader. But I think the mighty but evil Darth had other offspring...)

My Mother took a lover so my Dad is not my Dad
I've now discovered his ID - the news is pretty bad
He wants to rule the galaxy, owns his own Death Star
Darth Vader is my Pater
Darth Vader is my Pa

Because the Star Wars movies were huge box office hits
The demon from the Dark Side slept around a little bit
Waved his lightsaber far too much
Not knowing when to stop
So Luke Skywalker is my bro
And Darth Vader is my Pop

Guess I've found the reason why I'm such a heavy breather
It's all due to his DNA I use asthma relievers
It could have been Bin Laden or it could have been Hitler
But Darth Vader is my Daddy
And of that I feel quite bitter

The Force wells up inside me still my life is rather rough
Ashamed he builds The Empire and does tonnes of evil stuff
Maybe I'll meet a Wookiee, the thrill could not be bettered
But it's no laugh
The one called Darth
Is my begetter

The lesson to be learnt: Don't dig up your family tree
You don't know what you'll find playing genealogy
I sit waiting for the Jedi Knights to defeat my creator
Till then my name
Will have to change
From Neal Zetter...to Neal Vader