Never Wear Shorts

Never wear shorts in the winter

Never wear shorts in a breeze

You'll catch a chill, feel very ill

And both your knees will freeze

Never wear shorts when it's bitter

Never wear shorts when it's bleak

Achoo! Achoo! Achoo! Achoo!

You'll be in bed all week

Never wear shorts in a blizzard

Never wear shorts in the snow

Two legs + ice = not nice

While cutting cold winds blow

Never wear shorts if it's zero

Never wear shorts if it's brisk

Bare limbs turn blue, you'll catch the flu

Now is that worth the risk?

But...

Always wear shorts in the summer

Always wear shorts in the heat

Then you can plan a healthy tan

From thighs down to your feet!