If I had a magic rubber
I'd rub out fighting and war
And matches that my football team loses (or draws)
I'd rub out horrible diseases
Tornadoes
Volcanoes
Thunder and lightning
Scary stuff that's way too frightening

I'd rub out poverty, starvation
Accidents and disasters
Boring supermarket shopping
Strict nasty headmasters
7 a.m. alarm clocks ringing
Stinging nettles stinging
My Dad in the shower - when he's singing

Bullies would be high on my hit list
Homework too
I'd rub out the cages in the zoo
Till the animals were free
Muggers and robbers
Boiled cabbage and mushy peas

People's broken hearts
My little brother's stinky farts
Whatever makes me stressed
Difficult spelling tests
And all the grey clouds in the sky till only blue was left
I'd even rub out death

Toothaches
Earthquakes
Whoever scoffed my last Easter egg
Anything that hurts
Rudeness
Annoying TV adverts
Buses and trains that never come
Long division and multiplication sums
Moments of madness
Teardrops of sadness
I'd erase the whole lot

And when everything was absolutely perfect in this world...
I'd rub out my magic rubber as well