I've got a moany neighbour
Who always is complaining
She doesn't like the weather hot
And whinges when it's raining

She hates it when it's quiet
But despises too much noise
She grumbles when I play outside
With other girls and boys

She says dogs are deplorable
And cannot cope with cats
She gives abuse to refuse trucks
She thinks they bring in rats

She shouts "YOUR TV'S MUCH TOO LOUD!"
While banging on our wall
She nags us in the holidays
But whines when we're at school

She's angry with the pensioner
At number thirty-eight
She carps about the squeaking sound
Of our old rusty gate

She criticises window cleaners
And the postmen too
Every night she remonstrates
Each time we flush our loo

No matter where Dad parks his car
She cries "THAT'S MY PARKING SPACE!"
If you saw her you'd know her
By her scary stony face

She moans about the driveways
She moans about road signs
She moans about the potholes
She moans about the crime
She moans about the gardens
She moans about the litter
She moans about the Council Tax
She's miserable and bitter
She moaned when we moved in
She's moaning 'cause we're going
She saw my website yesterday
Now she's moaning about this poem